Thursday, August 30, 2012

Thoughts: Why do girls care about "being beautiful"?

  An interesting question was posed the other night when my family and I were watching America's Got Talent.  Edon, a singer in the competition, sang "What Makes You Beautiful" by One Direction (possibly the most catchy song ever).  The question posed was this - "Why do all girls long to be told they are beautiful, especially by a boy?"
  I'd never really thought about this.  My first answer was that the media pushes girls to be beautiful and if they do not match "worldly" standards (or do not think they do) they tend to feel less than.  My mom pointed out that this was not really true, because even in the Bible women wanted to be beautiful, and there was no media in those days (though there may have been some pressure from society).   

  So why is that?  Why do girls (myself included) feel such a need for approval from boys our age?  If we have not had a father figure to tell us we are beautiful, the need is even worse.  But I've found that all girls, no matter what type of family they come from, have this same, universal need -"Just tell me I'm beautiful."  Is it because we all have a bit of insecurity about this issue?  If so, why is it still such a big deal to us?  Guys have a need to feel important, strong, and capable.  But they still don't usually have a need to feel beautiful.  Maybe it's because, generally, women are the prettiest creations.  Maybe we recognize this and when nobody has pointed out we're pretty we automatically assume we're not.  Maybe it's different personalities and levels of confidence that make some girls needier of this than others.  Maybe it's a trust issue - that it's not enough for just one person to tell us how nice we look because they might be lying.  We need more and more confirmation.

The bottom line is that I wish women would not seek this attention from guys that are unworthy of them - guys who will just make the girls feel worse about themselves.  This need for affirmation is something we need to fix in ourselves somehow.  Because girls, you may think a boy's affections are the answer to your insecurity, but unless you are fully at peace with yourself and how you look the relationship will just crash and burn.  Remember, we're all beautiful because we are humans made in God's image.  And the most "comely" face is ruined if the heart is not being cared for.

Why do you think girls long to be told they are beautiful?

P.S.  Have you guys been liking these sort of advice/thought posts I've been doing (the last one was here)?  Let me know in the comments.  Also, don't forget about the giveaway I'm hosting here.  You have no chance of winning if you don't enter. :)


Marianela said...

This is a very interesting question indeed. :)
I'll have to think on that, but thanks for bringing it up though!

Yes, keep on doing them! They're very intriguing. ;)

Marian said...

Comparing ourselves to others is a universal problem. Speaking of female beauty, specifically, I think this is an unfortunate "tradition" due to gender stereotypes. Before the 20th century, most women were (generally) expected to get married, and being called beautiful made them more marriageable, and in a sense, more successful. It's pretty sad.

Today, I think (as you said) the media has helped this idea survive. Also, society now has a preconceived notion of how men view women, which is not flattering to either gender.

Lydia said...

@ Nela: Do think on it! It's something I've really been turning over and over in my head lol. Yay! I'm glad they're intriguing! :D It's kind of hard to know what direction I want my blog to take - more about fashion? More about posts like this? More about music? Or maybe all of these subjects? Haha. :)

@ Marian: You're right - it is a universal problem. The point you raise about this being traditional is interesting. That reminds me of Pride and Prejudice where Mr. Collins was like going going crazy over Elizabeth because he was wanting to marry her. I just wish that girls had guys that really meant that they were beautiful saying it to them rather than just a phrase for getting the girl in a relationship with them. Like you said, the idea nowadays of how men are supposed to view women can be pretty disturbing. :/


Love this post! To it seems the word 'beautiful' has been tainted by the media and no longer means what it should, maybe one day everyone will believe they are beautiful ^__^

Thank you for commenting on my blog as well :)
Would you like to follow each other?


Lydia said...

Thank you! You know, I think you're right - "beauty" doesn't even have the right meaning anymore. I hope everyone feels they are beautiful someday, too. :)

And yes, I'd love for us to follow each other! I'll go follow you right now. ♥

Michlyn said...

I'm pretty sure you just wrote my thoughts above.

You're a great writer! :)


Lydia said...

Glad you enjoyed it! Aw, thank you! :D That means a lot to me!

DSK Steph said...

I really enjoyed reading this!